VodkaPundit: You’ll Never Guess What Victorinox Is Removing from Its Iconic Swiss Army Knife

Actually, you will. We have covered it before. But this is from a non-industry source, and a writer whose style I enjoy. Worth a read.

It’s a steak and salad without the steak. It’s Wham! without George Michael*. It’s Presidentish Joe Biden without his teleprompter. Hell, it might even be Biden with his teleprompter.

It’s a Swiss Army knife… without that bothersome knife part.

Swiss firm Victorinox has made a huge assortment of its iconic pocket knives for more than a century, going all the way back to 1897. Depending on the size, you might find everything from a can opener to a saw to a magnifying glass and even surprisingly sharp little scissors.

The one thing — two things, actually — you could count on finding in the bigger models were a longer blade of almost three inches and a shorter blade an inch or so long.

Until now. In Britain. That’s where Victorinox will soon introduce “the first range of bladeless products designed specifically for activities where a blade would not be required,” according to the Guardian. The reason, if you hadn’t already guessed, is to combat (“Word choice!”) “what an English judge last week called the ‘plague of knife crime.'”

Have they not considered what someone could do with the hole punch found on many of the larger models?

ASIDE: I used an AI generator to make the image atop this article, hoping that it would come up with something just as ridiculous as a knifeless pocket knife — and it delivered.

Read the whole thing at