Weekend Open Thread: Play Stupid Games Edition…

H. Clay Aalders
Weekend Open Thread
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Hey everybody…

I hope everyone had a great week, and thank you once again for joining us for another meme-filled journey on the KNIFE Magazine Weekend Open Thread.

 

It was the 82nd Anniversary of the Pearl Harbor attack yesterday, and as Mark Twain said, “History doesn’t repeat itself, but it often rhymes”, or something to that effect. Just ask Harry Truman…

Nothing about that is applicable today now is it?

Of course you come here for humor among other things, and

There is no such thing as “too soon” on the Internet. 82 years and funny should be safe for these pages.

Whoops.

I feel stupider for having read that 🙂

Speaking of maps…

That is a long time to wait.

We are in the annual holiday lull for knife shows, there is nothing on the KNIFE Magazine Events Calendar until SHOT Show at the end of January. They will be back before we know it, so please be sure to check back next month.

We have some more memes to help you get in the Christmas spirit…

Since there is no more Elf on a Shelf…

Related:

I guess the fact that Harrison Ford is in both movies is a segue…

Sorry, It was the best I could do.

“Well, I tell you what we gonna do! We just gonna introduce ’em to the boy. So move over a bit, good buddy, ’cause the Snowman is coming through! Hold onto your ass Fred.” – Cledus “The Snowman” Snow

Prepare to be knocked off the table.

I’m not saying that Stalin is Santa, but I have never seen the two together at the same time.

Like every other Hallmark movie.

It’s a trap!

“He worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium; a master.”

Wait, what!?!…

 

Mind blown.

Apologies for the earworm.

h/t Tim Stetzer for that one.

Probably not.

Valid excuse.

“Heeeyyy-Yooo!!!”

On that happy note…We are in the middle of a “Two Token” drawing for a CRKT Provoke.

The way it works for those who might be new to the Open Thread is that you get a “token” the first week you are drawn, and the first person to be drawn a second time is the winner of the knife. Up to 5 comments or replies are your entries, and new commenters get double credit. If you are new, your comments will be held in moderation until I approve them the first time.

So Good Luck everyone, the Provoke is a neat knife.

This week’s musical selection…

You may recognize that from a Heineken commercial. Asteroids Galaxy Tour are a Danish pop/funk band. The video is pretty cool. The song is pretty hot.

On to Round 3:

Effing Globalists.

To quote the Blogfather: “I will start believing it is a crisis when the people who are telling me it is a crisis start acting like it is a crisis. Until then, I don’t want to hear another thing about my Carbon Footprint.

Perhaps related to the previous two?

I am not worried about AI…

Public Service Announcement…

Which is a worse idea?

I have a better idea…

I wonder if they taste like chicken?

OK.  That has run its course.

How did Ms. Cleo not see her Psychic Hotline going bankrupt?

 

 

The goodest boi.

Admirable indeed.

It has been a long time since I have had a good croissant. Or bagel for that matter.

Ouch. Or Meow.

Jesus took you literally. And the wheel.

You wouldn’t want that now would you?

I’m lovin’ it.

Not lovin’ it…

The Presidents of Harvard, MIT, and UPenn showed their moral cowardice when asked the simple question whether students calling for genocide against Jewish students at their respective institutions. Their answers left a lot to be desired. Apparently it “depends on the context”.

 

I am sure that there are some readers who wonder why I am dedicating a portion of the Open Thread each week to a serious topic like Israel’s war against Hamas, following the October 7th attacks – just 2 weeks and a day ago.

Rich Eisen, the sports commentator said it best this week, when he broke from his usual format to address their testimony before context.

“What if I said nothing? I don’t want my kids to look at me one day and say, “Dad, you had a platform. You had a microphone in front of your face. Why didn’t you say something?” (watch the whole thing here)

I don’t have a microphone, but I have a platform. There is right and wrong in this world. I will not sit by idly when I can use my voice to speak out against the wave of antisemitism that has me sick to the pit of my stomach.

Until the time that Israel feels that it can declare victory, I am going to continue to speak out.

With leadership like we are seeing at our “elite” Universities, what do you expect?

And finally, a reminder that the Miracle of light shines brightest in times of darkness.

Have a good one everybody, and Happy Hanukkah to those to whom it applies.

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H. Clay Aalders

H. Clay Aalders is a lifelong edged tool user. He spent the past 20 years as a woodworker and fishing guide in Ohio, Pennsylvania, Idaho, and Tennessee. While guiding in Idaho, Clay worked part-time writing for a local newspaper, and upon moving to Tennessee began writing for the blog The Truth About Knives - spending his last 5 years there as Managing Editor. His background is in fixed-blade hunting and bushcraft knives, but has jumped into the world of vintage slipjoint collecting with both feet since coming to work at Knife Magazine. Clay’s primary role is as Digital Editor, curating and creating new content for our website and blog, as well as maintaining the Knife Magazine social media accounts (FB/IG: @theknifemag, Twitter: @knifemagazine). He is also a contributor and Associate Editor of the print magazine.

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35 Responses

  1. The Rosecraft arrived this week. So cool to get a knife in the mail. The delivery guy said, “I have a parcel for you”. I know was my reply. He was surprised how I knew because he gets no notifications on mail from the U.S.

    Second surprise of the day was showing my wife, I was demonstrating the crisp action when she grabbed the knife and claimed the prize. Pays to be fast in our house.
    It is an exceptional little knife, will let you know how she likes it! 🙂

    Reply

      1. She does already Mark. It made me smile too, I was so excited to see how crisp the action was, by the time the blade made the second snap to fully open she had it in her hand. Too funny!

        Reply

  2. did sony use the date from the pearl harbor attack as the example in their first vhs owners manual?
    “…deal with a beast…”
    we (u.s.) called zeros “zekes.” mitsu created a lighter, susceptible to corrosion alloy they dubbed “extra super duralumin.” in the early years they outmaneuvered everything. they didn’t use mishi engines though, nakajima built sakaes were 14cyl aircooled radials, first with blowers, then two stage blowers. they developed a hybrid turbo/ supercharger, but it was sidelined. when you see one in a film they’re usually modified t6 texans.
    a pangea tat would be cheaper.
    surprised that that was ford in the apocalypse movie, saw it first run, never realized.
    “snort hunger lay monger snapsill cocker smelly rat ruster grop dumb frattenhouse nickelfeiffer snard bunker smelly mop buster bladder puss snot grafter!” surprised that got past the censors.
    200years after the vikings came the normans… what is a brit?
    greta can hunt me if i get a napalm flamethrower and a ’70 fleetwood.
    legolas (sorry). built a styrene guillotine model as a pre- teen, chopped that guys head into the basket constantly.
    the mice came in from the cold. they enjoy gnawing on magic eraser sponges, probably akin to squeeky cheese curds to us. heard one in the brown paper recycling grocery bag, no mercy. peanut buttered victor traps with sewing thread wound into the bait has scored two this season.
    there have been flamingo sightings in wisconsin recently. and the armored dilla continues expanding north.
    “i think i’m a moth.”
    “i’m a butcher, the shrinks office is next door.”
    “yeah, but your light was on.”
    chanukka candles are a rip- off. i find really groovy birthday ones that aren’t white or kosher. sparkly, sparkling, aluminum sheathed- way cooler and 1/ 10th the cost.

    Reply

    1. “Peanut butter baited “Victor” snap-action traps” last forever! I use 3-in-One on the coil spring . . . I believe the mice like that smell. I keep track of “kills” by marking the back of the trap with a Sharpie (I use the “prison wall count the days method” (four vertical lines slashed diagonally). My best trap has “23 kills” to date. “Victor” will kill !!
      “Hocky on the Dark Far Side” (Gary Larson)

      Reply

      1. Wow Hocky! You have this down pat!

        My preferred, tried and true method, is putting some cheese in the floor in the kitchen, then in the living room I sit with the trusty bb gun. You just have to watch that you don’t shoot someone’s eye out!

        Reply

        1. Great “Christmas Story”!

          Footnote: Mice are strong vermin. I caught one by its front leg and it dragged the trap under the water heater and got stuck! Of course, I put it out of its misery by “pinching its neck”. Another time, I got a momma mouse and its baby in the same trap . . . a “twofer”! I do not enjoy killing these animals, but, my wife does not like mouse “turds” in the basement storeroom. Once, I put a “Victor” rat trap near the water heater. She almost got hysterical at the thought of a giant rodent roaming the house.

          Reply

          1. we had an infestation in the apt. on lavergne near foster. got the same mom/ pup duo one time there, after i learned the thread trick.
            interesting to think the oil is an attractant, could be, i’d think repellent. i’ll try a little marvel’s. watch the “u”nails that anchor the coil spring bar down, they work free. squeeze them down with pliers if you see this happening.
            pellet pistol comes out if they run behind bookcase… then i use a fishing rod to pull them out.
            the rat traps control the chipgopher population alongside some marksmanship.

          2. Victor traps rule. I wire in an unshelled peanut slavered with peanut butter for bait, it can last several snaps. Marking kills on the trap seems like a great move, they should issue tiny rat silhouettes stickers to paste on, like the fighter planes kills tally. The trick here is to catch them later in the week, nearer bin day, so the corpses don’t get too rank and stink up the place. Good hunting!

          3. We lived in Vancouver when I was about 12 years old in a suburb called Whalley. It was down by the might Fraser river. Everyone was watching tv on evening, Bonanza or something. A huge shadow caught my eye, dad’s too. It was a huge river rat. He grabbed a broom an chased it down a hall cornering it; That sucker was defiant jumping as high as the the doorknob and screeching. Dad was an boilermaker, outdoorsman, grew up on a farm. A rat wasn’t getting the best of him. He clobbered that monster killing it instantly and wrecking the wall as well.

            We moved soon after, don’t think I slept until we did, believe that was when I slept with a knife under my pillow.

            Had a similar experience when we lived at Douglas Lake Ranch, only this one flew. One of daughters said there was something flying around their room, seemed strange as the light was off. Sure enough I could see a bat hanging from the ceiling. I had a broom too; As soon as I turned the light on the bat swooped down heading my way. I had my dad’s touch knocking it down, only stunned it allowing me to let it go outside.

            With all the mosquitos out there you would be shot for killing one of those lovely creatures!

          1. the above was in reference to del putting an eye out.
            i can just see retired mouse traps displayed on their sides with an accumulation of verified kill stickers and some fuselage pin up art on their bases. maybe a topless minnie or tanya mouskewitz.

          2. “The Victor Never Retires!!” . . .To the “Victor” goes the spoils!!

            Why have humans glorified mice? “Jerry Mouse”; “Mighty Mouse”; “Mickey Mouse” . . . especially “Mickey”. Walt was doing hallucinogens when he drew that cartoon. Most veterans know that “Mickey Mouse” is a term for simple-minded sh_t. Oh, “Minnie” is a slut. She and “Goofy” hooked up.

            I am going outside to cool off. I got boxes of “free knives” from my favorite charitable thrift store to sift through. Most are junk. Maybe there is a vintage “Old Hickory” . . .

  3. Scandinavian tourists is hilarious! Another great job Clay!

    Greta scares me more than a ship full of Vikings!

    “Ralphie” cracks me up, has to be him for the win!

    Reply

  4. It took a while to get the Honda LMNt one. Worth the effort though.
    I drew Jury duty this last week and next, the main issue (other than the time suck) is having to de-knife yourself every day to get into the court house without falling foul of the Feds. Check pockets and key rings.

    Reply

    2. “Tattoo” says, “Boss, De’ Knife! De’ Knife!”. (Herve Villechaize, 1943-1993). “Nick Nack” (“Man With the Golden Gun”, 1974) holding a spear over “007” is memorable. His romance with “Miss Goodnight” (Britt Eklund) was “short-lived”. Just one of those Monday mornings . . .

      Reply

    3. they stopped me for the 4″ “crescent” wrench i carry. set it on top of some high up exit light box. it was still there. i’ve had to stash shivs in the bushes before.

      Reply

  5. “Eat Squid” . . . Army-19 vs Navy-11 (“Nuke Army”). Army did run backwards out of the end-zone to end the game . . . Navy should recruit a few 300-lb’ers for their O-line if they are going for the “Philly Ass-Shove”. I liked that “Boomer” logo on the Navy helmets.

    Re “nukes”, “Little Boy” (Hiroshima**) and “Fat Man” (Nagasaki) were terrible “necessities” to end the world war with Japan. My submarine carried 16 ICBMs each with “Multiple Inertia Re-entry Vehicles (MIRVs). (MIRV is a nuclear destructive device, . . . aka an “A-Bomb”). Our nation’s fleet ballistic submarines starting with the “USS George Washington” in 1960 and continuing through the “USS Will Rogers” (Got a sense of humor?) circa 1967, consisted of what is known as “41 for Freedom”. These “classes” of subs were: Washington; Ethan Allen; Lafayette; James Madison and Benjamin Franklin. My boat, the USS George Bancroft SSBN643 was a “Franklin-class”. All of these submarines are now decommissioned. The Navy started building the “Ohio-class” boats in the 1970’s. They were the first “Trident” submarines.

    (Note** My mother-in-law, Kumiko Nagai, lived in the small village of Iwakuni near Hiroshima. She was six years old when “Little Boy” was dropped. She remembers sheltering in a cave before the “drop” because America dropped leaflets as a warning of the bombing.)
    Kumi is now 84 years old and living well near Tampa, Florida. She is a funny lady.

    Reply

    2. The history of your “Boat” and the others is fascinating Hocky. Every time I watch those classic sub movies puts my imagination in overdrive. I wouldn’t last a week, amazing feat to serve your country, quite another to serve on those. Looking forward to seeing the peddlers bag and hearing more about your time on the boat. Hopefully you do the PNW loop soon! 🙂

      Reply

      1. Hey Del! The coming year of 2024 should involve some travel on my part. January through April will be mostly East Coast starting with trip to King’s Bay Submarine Base (KBSB), Georgia; and, possibly to Tampa, Florida** to visit my in-laws. My new role on the “USS George Bancroft SSBN643 Association” Board of Directors (www.SSBN643.org) has been energizing. Quite a number of our Association’s crew members are men who I served with from 1975-1978 during five deterrent patrols. On April 27, 2024, the Association is having a “Picnic” at the “Bancroft Sail” memorial at “KBSB”. I expect that 200 or more crew members will be there.
        Going on to Tampa would put me within 15 minutes of Lakeland, Florida and the “46th Annual Gator Cutlery Club Show” (January 26,27,28th).

        I visited the “J&S Guns and Pawns” yesterday. More of the “Case” slip-joints were on display. All of them were in boxes . . . but, not “MIB”**. Hmm-mm-mm . . . Using my “Price Guide to Collector’s Knives” by Houston Price, 13th Edition, I found pattern numbers, e.g. “6254”; but, something wasn’t right about the knives and their “boxes”. These were “Case Collector’s Club” knives. Reproductions of vintage “Case” patterns, albeit “Made in USA by “Case”. So, shucks. **I was tempted to buy one or two; but, the blade edges on these knives were “blunt”. The factory edge was gone. Hmmm-mm . . . How did this happen? I figure the original owner “did something” to clean the blades or “dress the edges”. So, I was diligent in looking “real close” at these knives; and, exercised “lessons learned” from previous inspections of “too good to be true” knives.

        Useful tool find at “Rescue Mission” thrift store: “Troy-bilt Power RR650” bypass loppers – $2.00. Cutting blade needs a re-grind; or, buy a new one, $20. These loppers were made in Germany! Always nice to use tools from our Allies!

        Reply

        2. Hocky – I just finished “War Beneath the Waves” by Don Keith about the ‘mutiny’ on USS Billfish during WW2. It’s a great read about being attacked for 16 hours with depth charges, and those who lived through it. US subs sunk 50% of shipping, were just 2% of US forces and suffered 20% casualty rate, quite a record.

          Reply

          1. Thanks for the referral on the Don Keith book. Looking forward to making contact with you regarding the “Bull Trout”. You made me laugh when you asked me to check my “spam folder” . . . A number of peculiar images entered my mind. Realistically, a folding knife with “Spam Slab Scales” and an “old-school winding-key” for a pocket clip has possibilities!

          2. That was not a mutiny on the “USS Billfish SS286” in 1943. Lt. Charles Rush took command of the sub after the relentless depth charging incapacitated the senior officers. He dove the boat to beyond its test depth to an estimated 600 feet. He then maneuvered the boat on a reverse course to elude the attacking Japanese ships. His actions saved the entire crew. The “Billfish” was severely damaged, notably an engine shaft knocked out-of-alignment. Chief Electrician’s Mate John Rendernick and other crew members “jacked” the shaft into alignment and the boat was able to return to port. “Captain” Charles Rush was awarded the “Navy Cross” in 2002 for his courage and valor during this dire event. The “Silver Star” was posthumously awarded to Chief Petty Officer Rendernick

            The Pacific “theater of operations” (PTO) in WW2 after Pearl Harbor relied on the U.S. Submarine Forces to stop the Japanese. This was accomplished at a tremendous cost of submarine crews and their boats.

            To this day, men and women who serve on our nation’s submarines are all volunteers.

            During my service, I received $100 a month “hazardous duty” pay for going on deterrent patrols. Not taxed . . .

            “Hocky, MM1(SS)”

  6. Thanks Clay!
    I watched a reply of the university presidents before Congress. I wondered if their answers would have been the same had they been asked about the phrase “Death to Hamas!”
    Spilled the beans took me a minute, but when I got it, I spewed some coffee!
    Loved the Honda alphabet!
    Heading out to finalize birthday shopping for my lovely wife. Then to start my shopping for her for Christmas.
    Hope you all have a great weekend. And those of you in the way of this winter storm, stay warm and safe!

    Reply

  7. KISS: There are approximately 2 million people in the area called the “Gaza Strip”. These people are often referred to as Palestinians because the huge area surrounding “Gaza” was known as Palestine going way, way back in time. Now, the “Hamas” terrorists number about 20-30 thousand; and, they came to rule the “Gaza Strip” about a decade ago or thereabouts.

    The ratio of “Palestinians” to “Hamas(ians?)” would be approximately 100:1.

    Jiggling the “numbers” to exclude Palestinian children and the real elderly, I would think that the Palestinian majority would be able to eliminate the “Hamas-ians”, or what is left of them, after Israel flattens the “strip”.

    Onto the “WOT” memes: “Chewie on a Buoy”. . . I was hoping to see “Chewie with a Bowie”. The “Ghillie” tree triggered the light bulb in my skull.

    If I am fortunate to have my name selected by the “Random Number Generator (RNG)” for the “Provoke”, please pick again. My oft visited pawnshop has a “Provoke” for sale. Intrigued by this articulated tool, I attempted to operate it. “No Go” after several tries . . . perhaps there was a locking device? Is this designed to frustrate a septuagenarian?

    “Fixed Blade Knife”: No Moving Parts.

    Reply

      1. Only airport runs to pick folks up! My out of state kids and families are coming here! House is decorated. Several meals prepared and frozen. Most of the shopping is done. Two new grandsons will be here for their first Christmas! It is going to be terrific!

        Reply

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