Weekend Open Thread: Your Mama’s so ugly…

H. Clay Aalders
·8 Comments··3 views

I suppose I should start with the disclaimer that it is not the Editorial position of KNIFE Magazine that the pandemic is not real. It is a thing, I know people who have had Covid, I know a diabetic 74 year old with cancer who died having tested positive. It may have been the infamous “SHOT Show Flu” which ran through attendees in the weeks following the show. Mark got pretty sick, and I definitely had the crud.

I don’t remember if I shared this one, but Greg Medford apparently did as well.

 

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Is this you right now? #knifememe #gunmeme #funny #oregontrail @theneomag

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Notice the date…January 27th.

So…that all said, I almost did a spit-take myself when I saw that Yo Mama joke.

I thought this might spur some comments:

My vote is for a chainsaw, a negligee, and a tube of KY Jelly. Give us your three below.

What’s new with you? Did you see our new contest link?

Win a Brian Tighe Tighe Fighter (and announcing the winner of the CRKT XOC)

The Tighe is really nice. I have had a chance to handle it in the office.

After a rainout a couple of weeks ago, my girls had their first lacrosse game of the fall season Monday night. They won 12-9.

One more scrimmage this coming Monday evening. Then we finish the season next weekend with 4 games in 2 days in Gatlinburg. Lacrosse is actually a Spring sport, so Fall Ball is just an abbreviated developmental season. We end up with about 15 games in the Spring. Coaching has been one of the things that has helped keep me grounded this year, giving me a chance to feel normal for 90 minutes, two times per week. The girls are pretty special to me. There are a few, including my daughter, whom I have been coaching for 5 years now, since they were in 2nd grade.

That picture is a couple of years old now, but it is one of my favorites. She’s growing up too fast.

It is always strange where my muse will take me on any given night. Or where these threads will go for that matter.

There are a bunch of Johnny Quest/Mike Pence memes. But this one is my favorite. The dig at Justin Trudeau’s blackface flap was particularly funny.

It is getting late, and I am going to head off to bed. Wake me up in 2021.

Have a great weekend everyone. Go Buckeyes! O-H!

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H. Clay Aalders

H. Clay Aalders is a lifelong edged tool user. He spent the past 20 years as a woodworker and fishing guide in Ohio, Pennsylvania, Idaho, and Tennessee. While guiding in Idaho, Clay worked part-time writing for a local newspaper, and upon moving to Tennessee began writing for the blog The Truth About Knives - spending his last 5 years there as Managing Editor. His background is in fixed-blade hunting and bushcraft knives, but has jumped into the world of vintage slipjoint collecting with both feet since coming to work at Knife Magazine. Clay’s primary role is as Digital Editor, curating and creating new content for our website and blog, as well as maintaining the Knife Magazine social media accounts (FB/IG: @theknifemag, Twitter: @knifemagazine). He is also a contributor and Associate Editor of the print magazine.

8 Responses

  1. MarkR: A “Congress” usually has four blades. Not many made today. Some customs are out there but $$$. The only one I own was Bill Moran’s. A gift to him from “Barney”. I bought it at the Moran estate auction in 2006. It’s a “Bertram, Hen & Rooster”, Solingen, Germany”. Have you considered a woodcarver set of knives? X-Acto? You can get a “whittler” from Case or other production company with a nice heirloom quality to impress the grandkids!

    And, . . . to get a “look” from the cashier: BIG bottle of chocolate syrup, grease gun and enema(s).

    Hocky on Sunday night

    Reply

  2. a large stuffed animal, a box of condoms and a jar of Vaseline should do. bonus points for a saw, hatchet or cleaver.

    Reply

  3. I’ll play!
    A shovel, duct tape and 10 gallons of hydrochloric acid;
    A tarp, shovel, and bone saw;
    Black ski mask, a 12 pack of 5 hour energy drink, 500 rounds of .223 ammunition.

    Clay-Enjoy your coaching time while you can! It was yesterday I was coaching my daughtrs’ softball teams! “Yesterday” ended 22 years ago! There’s a lot of truth to the expression,”The days take forever, the years fly by!”

    I’m beginning my “retired grampa pocketknife” search in ernest-I have no experience with Congress style slip joints? Anyone have any thoughts?

    Reply

        2. Hocky-I have several fixed blade carving and whittling knives. They work very well and are what I use most of the time. Sometimes. I prefer to use a pocket knife. I’ve tried X-Acto knives. They’re okay for very soft wood, but on anything harder than balsa, I can’t get them to preformed well.
          The Congress question was promoted by a cold front. The arthritis in my hands was s bothering me; I thought they might be little wider then most jack knives, and maybe a little easier on my hands for extended use. Thanks for your thoughts.

          Reply

          1. Mark: Yep, arthritis in the fingers and hands is a game-changer. I do not know your talent(s) for modifying the scales on a slipjoint. Rehandling one with wider scales is a sound possibility. You can shape it the way is most comfortable for your use. My “congress” has a greater width than most “jacks”. Another idea is using a “pruner” handle. Very comfortable. You might find a used pruner or hawkbill knife at a flea market or other place. I mentioned that I have used some “hawkbill linoleum” knife handles for a more comfortable grip. Good luck.

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